When Another Person Does Not Even Bother to Try, How Should You Respond?

A relationship involves two or more people. We often refer to a relationship as give and take, easy as it might sound, it’s also difficult to debate on this statement. There need would be met for as long as they are getting together.

There are other things that can be distinctive to both of them, for this means that both parties will have different needs per time. Even though they might be some sure needs which will be common between the two of them.

The Essentials

There are some common needs that can be seen among them, which can be the need for attention, to be respected, appreciated, for example. Physical and sexual needs can also be part of it.

There won’t be any trouble for them to get them met, when both of them understands the these needs. To ensure there is no challenge between them, one of them needs to be there for the other person.

Point to be Watchful

When they look through themselves, could ensure that most of their needs will be met. This can produce tremendous results on the ground that their partner isn’t self-centered person, who must kind enough to go beyond miles to achieve success in their relationship.

A point in time could come when one gives and even moments when they receive together, by and large, each of them should be permitted to get what they might need. Even when one gives more than they receive, we should understand that it is still part of life.

The Beginning

Commitment is very crucial in the relationship as it should be the duty of the both of them, enabling them to stand for each other. It is possible that one might not get their needs met, but should be sad, rather they should talk about it with their partner.

Getting annoyed happens easily when the other feel as though they were ignored and left their needs unmet. Yet other person might not even be aware of the hurt they are causing to the other

Mind Reading

Something like this wouldn’t have been necessary if humans could smartly scan through the minds of each other. Two people would immediately read the humans could smartly scan through the minds of each other. They would immediately read through each other minds, see their needs and instantly met them.

With time as they progress and in tune with each other, they could get the sense of what their needs might be.

At First

There is the possibility that at the beginning of a relationship, their needs might be met. The only desire in the beginning of the relationship will be to meet the met of each other, causing them to be their best and bring out their best attitude.

When they have been together for a while, they become more open to each other, but there could be change in behaviour which is normal when it happens. It could be instantly or might be difficult for them to notice any of this changes that could occur.

Moving On

As time progresses, if each other feel relaxed with themselves, their relationship might be expected to be on another level different from what it is at the initial stage. It makes the relationship a lot easier to enjoy if understanding of themselves is achieve. Even though they still look the same, the other might still wonder if they are not in a relationship with someone else.

Out of Balance

As a result of what they are seeing and noticing, they might want to ensure the change doesn’t take place, allowing the relationship to go back just the same way it has been from the onset.

This might cause the other to make amends in their attitude in just a very short time, which might not last for a long time. Ensuring the other did not alter their behaviour, it is expected for the other to stand by the other.

Positive Reinforcement

The person won’t know there is a change in their behaviour if the other doesn’t let them know. The less effort they put in been together, one tend to put even more.

When one don’t longer invest more in the relationship, the other feels less accepted and is drawn off, and there won’t be any reason for them to change their behaviour.

Opening Up

They both need to say how they sees things, giving each other the opportunity to share and discuss what is on running through their minds, because there might be reasons for any reoccurring patterns and behaviour.

On the other hand, for example, they could lay blame on each other for change in behavior. This clearly shows that they changed without them noticing it.

Awareness

They are doubtful to get that far when the other is not ready to admit or come to agreement of the change taking place regardless. One could take time to have a serious thought on what is taking place and make up his mind to take decision on what to do afterwards.

Having notice all this, it will be very good for them to ensure they agree to stay with each other. A decision taken earlier will makes their life better when they move sooner from the other.

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Relationships: Do People Say That All Men/Women Are The Same To Avoid Taking Responsibility?

What is clear is that although some people have relationships that are fulfilling, there are others who don’t. And while this can mean that they end up with people who are not right for them, it could also mean that they end up with people who are abusive.

Two Experiences

If one has the tendency to end up with people who are not right for them, this is likely to cause them to experience a lot of frustration. In addition to this, they could feel powerless, and as though they have no control over this area of their life.

On the other hand, if one is used to attracting people who are abusive, they could feel even worse. Along with feeling powerless, one could be in a position where they feel extremely worthless.

One Level

Thus, when one continually ends up with people who are not right for them, it is going to create problems. And as far as they are concerned, this could be seen as being as bad as it can get.

If they were to talk to their friends about what has been taking place for them, they could also agree. But if one doesn’t have this outlook, it could show that they realise this area of their life could be even worse.

Another Level

When it comes to someone who is used to ending up with people who are abusive, it is naturally going to cause them to experience a lot of pain. And as they experience life in this way, they might hope that it doesn’t get any worse.

Their friends could wonder why one has these kinds of people in their life, and so they might spend a lot of time worrying about them. At the same time, a number of their friends could also be in the same position.

The Same Story

Now, regardless of whether one has been with a number of people who are not right for them or people who are abusive, they might decide to take a step back from this area of their life. This could be seen as something that will allow them to find someone who is different.

And after taking a break, they may find that they end up with someone who is exactly the same as the last person they were with. One can then come to believe that they are a victim, and that there is nothing they can do to change their life.

Disconnected

What this can then show is that one is out of touch with their anger, or that they rarely embrace this side of their nature. As a result of this, it then causes them to fall down, so to speak.

Their emotional self will have collapsed, and this is then why they feel as though they have no control over what is taking place. Yet if this doesn’t take place and one is able to embrace their anger, they will be able to feel different.

Rising Up

Through embracing their anger, one could feel as though they can do something about what is taking place in their life. Their anger will then have given them the confidence and the fuel to move forward.

There could be moments when they collapse and feel like a victim, and moments when they are able to embrace their anger and feel as though they can change their life. If one can only do this every now and then, it could still give the chance to experience life differently.

Stepping Back

What will also help is if one is able to take a step back from how they feel and to look into what they can do to change their circumstances. As if they were to become consumed by their anger and it wasn’t possible for them to use it in a constructive manner, their life could end up staying the same.

Through feeling energised, they could find a book that will help them to understand why they are experience life in this way. And/or, they could find a therapist who will allow them to look into what is taking place within them and to gradually work through it.

Another Outcome

Alternatively, one could have moments when they get angry, but they might not take the time to look into why they are experiencing life in this way. It is then not going to matter what part they are playing in all this, as they will blame the people they have been with.

What could also take place is that one could say that all men/women are the same, and one is then going to see themselves as being nothing more than an observer of their reality. Therefore, one just happens to end up with people who are not right for them or who are abusive.

Higher Up

Through being this way, it will allow one to feel good about themselves, and they will be able to direct their anger at all men/women. They might even end up joining some kind of movement, and this will make them feel even better.

One will see their sex as being the victims and the opposite sex will be seen as the perpetrators. This can then allow one to feel as though they are morally superior, and they can come to believe that the opposite sex is not as evolved or developed.

Stuck

But while there are going to be people out there who have the same experiences as they do, it doesn’t mean that all me/women are the same. If anything, it can simply show that these people have the same issues as they do.

The trouble with believing that all men/women are the same is that it is not going to allow one to change their life. In order for this to take place, one will need to take responsibility for what is going on within them.

Awareness

When it comes to the kind of experiences one has with men/women, it typically relates to what took place when they were younger. So, if this area of their life is not working, it might be a good idea for them to look into what took place when they were younger.

Through doing this, it can allow them to work through the pain that is within them and to heal themselves. This is something that can take place with the assistance of a therapist or a healer.

Prolific writer, author, and coach, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over one thousand three hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. His current projects include ‘A Dialogue With The Heart’ and ‘Communication Made Easy’.

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Relationships: Do People Say That All Men/Women Are The Same To Avoid Taking Responsibility?

What is clear is that although some people have relationships that are fulfilling, there are others who don’t. And while this can mean that they end up with people who are not right for them, it could also mean that they end up with people who are abusive.

Two Experiences

If one has the tendency to end up with people who are not right for them, this is likely to cause them to experience a lot of frustration. In addition to this, they could feel powerless, and as though they have no control over this area of their life.

On the other hand, if one is used to attracting people who are abusive, they could feel even worse. Along with feeling powerless, one could be in a position where they feel extremely worthless.

One Level

Thus, when one continually ends up with people who are not right for them, it is going to create problems. And as far as they are concerned, this could be seen as being as bad as it can get.

If they were to talk to their friends about what has been taking place for them, they could also agree. But if one doesn’t have this outlook, it could show that they realise this area of their life could be even worse.

Another Level

When it comes to someone who is used to ending up with people who are abusive, it is naturally going to cause them to experience a lot of pain. And as they experience life in this way, they might hope that it doesn’t get any worse.

Their friends could wonder why one has these kinds of people in their life, and so they might spend a lot of time worrying about them. At the same time, a number of their friends could also be in the same position.

The Same Story

Now, regardless of whether one has been with a number of people who are not right for them or people who are abusive, they might decide to take a step back from this area of their life. This could be seen as something that will allow them to find someone who is different.

And after taking a break, they may find that they end up with someone who is exactly the same as the last person they were with. One can then come to believe that they are a victim, and that there is nothing they can do to change their life.

Disconnected

What this can then show is that one is out of touch with their anger, or that they rarely embrace this side of their nature. As a result of this, it then causes them to fall down, so to speak.

Their emotional self will have collapsed, and this is then why they feel as though they have no control over what is taking place. Yet if this doesn’t take place and one is able to embrace their anger, they will be able to feel different.

Rising Up

Through embracing their anger, one could feel as though they can do something about what is taking place in their life. Their anger will then have given them the confidence and the fuel to move forward.

There could be moments when they collapse and feel like a victim, and moments when they are able to embrace their anger and feel as though they can change their life. If one can only do this every now and then, it could still give the chance to experience life differently.

Stepping Back

What will also help is if one is able to take a step back from how they feel and to look into what they can do to change their circumstances. As if they were to become consumed by their anger and it wasn’t possible for them to use it in a constructive manner, their life could end up staying the same.

Through feeling energised, they could find a book that will help them to understand why they are experience life in this way. And/or, they could find a therapist who will allow them to look into what is taking place within them and to gradually work through it.

Another Outcome

Alternatively, one could have moments when they get angry, but they might not take the time to look into why they are experiencing life in this way. It is then not going to matter what part they are playing in all this, as they will blame the people they have been with.

What could also take place is that one could say that all men/women are the same, and one is then going to see themselves as being nothing more than an observer of their reality. Therefore, one just happens to end up with people who are not right for them or who are abusive.

Higher Up

Through being this way, it will allow one to feel good about themselves, and they will be able to direct their anger at all men/women. They might even end up joining some kind of movement, and this will make them feel even better.

One will see their sex as being the victims and the opposite sex will be seen as the perpetrators. This can then allow one to feel as though they are morally superior, and they can come to believe that the opposite sex is not as evolved or developed.

Stuck

But while there are going to be people out there who have the same experiences as they do, it doesn’t mean that all me/women are the same. If anything, it can simply show that these people have the same issues as they do.

The trouble with believing that all men/women are the same is that it is not going to allow one to change their life. In order for this to take place, one will need to take responsibility for what is going on within them.

Awareness

When it comes to the kind of experiences one has with men/women, it typically relates to what took place when they were younger. So, if this area of their life is not working, it might be a good idea for them to look into what took place when they were younger.

Through doing this, it can allow them to work through the pain that is within them and to heal themselves. This is something that can take place with the assistance of a therapist or a healer.

Prolific writer, author, and coach, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over one thousand three hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. His current projects include ‘A Dialogue With The Heart’ and ‘Communication Made Easy’.

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Relationships: Can Someone Put Up With Bad Behaviour When They Feel Worthless?

It is going to be a lot better for someone’s wellbeing if they spend time around people who treat them well. This is then the same as how one is likely to feel better about themselves if they eat healthy food.

But while this is the case, it doesn’t mean that everyone spends time around people who treat them in this way. In the same way, there are plenty of people who eat food that isn’t good for them.

The Ideal

When one is used to spending time around people who treat with them well, they are not going to be undermined by them. They will be able to be themselves, and the people around them will also be able to behave in the same way.

One is then going to feel good in their presence, and they should have a similar experience even when their time together comes to an end. This means that when they have spent time with a friend, for instance, there is a strong chance that they will feel energised.

Two Sides

Having this person in their life is then going to make it more fulfilling than it would be if they didn’t know them. And it is unlikely to matter how long they have known them; what matters is the connection they have.

In addition to how one feels when they are with them and what takes place for them when their time together comes to an end, there will be the effect one has the other person. If one was to ask them about their experience, they may find that it is more or less the same.

A Select Few

There is the chance that one only has a few people like this is their life, and this is because these types of relationships will take time and energy. And as one only has so much time and energy, they are not going to be able to be this way with everyone.

Yet, if one does have a few people like this in their life, they won’t need to have a lot of friends who are like this. This is not to say that they won’t know lots of people; what it comes down to is that they are going to have the same kind of connection with these people.

A Big Difference

The people they are close to are going to know who they are, and they are likely to spend a certain amount of time around them. When it comes to the other people they know, they are less likely to have a deep connection with them, and they might not see them very often.

It could be said that it is the difference between a real friend and someone who one is ‘friends’ with on social media. The former relates to someone who one can count on; the latter relates to someone who is simply another person on their friends list.

Another Angle

A real friend is going to have a positive effect on their life; whereas a friend on social media might not have an effect on their life. When one is friends with someone online, it can cause them to believe that they know them.

In reality, they might have only met them once; or, they might not have seen them for a number of years. So in the same way that plastic food is not going to take care of one’s nutritional needs; most of their friends on social media are not going to fulfil their mental and emotional needs.

Boundaries

And when one spends time around the people they are close to, they are likely to find that their boundaries are respected. One is then going to feel comfortable enough to stand their ground, and to say ‘no’ when they need to.

There will then be no reason for them to put on an act and to go along to get along. Ultimately, one is going to value themselves, and if this wasn’t the case, their life would be very different.

Another Experience

So while there will be people who spend time around people who treat them well, there are going to be others who don’t. As a result of this, one is likely to be undermined by most of the people in their life.

This could mean that one is used to being verbally abused, and they may even have moments when they are physically abused. These people could put them down in subtle ways, or it might be more be more direct than this.

Walked Over

And instead of being able to stand their ground and to say ‘no’, one will be used to having people take advantage of them. When this happens, they might not even allow themselves to show how they feel.

Or there could be moments when they do speak up, but this could be the exception as opposed to the rule. Being around people like this is going to make it hard for one to feel good about themselves.

No Resistance

But even if one does get angry about what is taking place, they could find that being treated in this way is what feels comfortable. Therefore, although it is causing them to suffer, they are not going to do anything about it.

What this can show is that one feel worthless, and this is then why they tolerate this kind of behaviour. Through feeling so low, they can believe that they deserve to be treated badly by others.

One Outlook

One way of looking at this would be to say that spending time with these kinds of people has caused them to feel this way. Ergo, one has just happened to end up with people who are abusive.

Another way of looking at it would be to say that one already felt this way, and this is why they came into contact with these people. What this can show is that one’s childhood years were a time when they were treated in the same way.

Awareness

Through being treated in this way, it would have ended up being what felt comfortable. These years were then a time when one was undermined by the people who were supposed to treat them with love and care.

If one can relate to this and they want to change their circumstances, they may need to work with a therapist or a healer. This will give them the chance to get in touch with what its taking place with them and to work through it.

Prolific writer, author, and coach, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over one thousand three hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. His current projects include ‘A Dialogue With The Heart’ and ‘Communication Made Easy’.

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Coaching Stars of Courage

Are you blessed with good health, a steady income, food on your table, and a comfy bed to sleep in at night? Are your kids going to school having eaten breakfast, with shoes on their feet, warm clothes in the winter, or the use of an umbrella and rubbers when it rains? Are their teeth and hair clean? Do they feel safe and secure? Is there a support system in place that you both can count on? Yes? No? Or maybe?! Isn’t it amazing what we all take for granted!

Stop a moment and feel grateful for everything in your life. Hug your kids today and ask them what they are appreciative of. Savor this. It is a wonderful way to start each day.

Now imagine that you and your family are homeless and that your survival instincts are in overdrive. Internally, hope plummets and self-esteem is rock bottom. How do you climb out of this dire situation? How do you turn your life around? How do you instill hope in the hearts of your children?

Ask yourself this question, “What is the one thing that successful people seem to consistently do?” The answer is, “They have a coach to help them reach their goals!” Do you know of anyone who is a lifestyle or business coach? Are you a coach? If you are a coach or know someone who is then take a look at this non-profit organization. See if it is a good fit for you.

“Founder of The Stars of Courage non-profit Ken D Foster is looking for Life, Business, Spiritual, and Health Coaches to help those who are living in poverty in the United States. If you are a Coach or know one, please read on.

“Evidenced-based studies show that combining life coaching with educational programs is effective at lifting people out of their economic struggles,” notes Ken D Foster, the Founder and Executive Director of Stars of Courage. As a Coach himself for 21 years, Ken knows first-hand the impact that coaching can have.”(1)

Can you find one hour a week to coach the poor?

“You have not lived today until you have done something for someone who can never repay you.” -John Bunyan

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Relationships: Why Do Some People Believe That They Are Not Enough For The Opposite Sex?

Although one can have the desire to be in a relationship, it doesn’t mean that this will actually take place. Instead, they could find it incredibly difficult to find someone to share their life with.

As a result of this, this area of their life could end up overshadowing just about every other area of their life. This comes down to the fact that they will spend a lot of time thinking about why their life is the way it is.

Two Parts

It is then going to be normal for their attention to be taken away from other areas of their life. But while one can spend a lot of time thinking about this, they can also end up being overwhelmed by pain.

In fact, one could spend far more time going over how they feel than they do thinking about why their life is the way it is. What this can then do is to cause one to see themselves as a victim.

Looking Back

If one was to look back on what has taken place in this area of their life, they may find that they only get so far. So perhaps they have been on dates with people, but that this is as far as it goes.

This is not to say that they haven’t been on a date that has gone well, as this is unlikely to be the case. Yet, even if they have had a number of dates that were successful, it wouldn’t have been possible for them to take things further.

Another Angle

When it comes to how they behaved, they may find that they were able to be themselves. At the same time, they may see that they ended up putting on an act each time, and that their true-self was covered up.

Or, they may have been moments when they showed up and moments when someone else appeared. Either way, as it didn’t allow them to go to the nest stage, it wouldn’t have mattered.

One Step Further

Alternatively, one may find that there has been at least one occasion when they were able to go further. This could mean that they had a few more dates and then it came to an end, or they might have ended up in a relationship.

If they did end up in a relationship, they may have found that their behaviour started to change. In the beginning, they may have been able to be themselves, and then as time passed, they might have turned into a people pleaser.

Erosion

Through changing their behaviour, it may have gradually pushed the other person away. Either consciously or unconsciously, the other person would have realised that something wasn’t right, and this would have changed how they felt.

However, if one wasn’t aware of what part they were playing in all this, they could have blamed the other person. This might have resulted in them feeling powerless, and as though they had no control.

Stepping Back

If one was able to take a step back from what they have experienced up until this point and to get in touch with what is taking place within them, it might allow then to see why they are experiencing life his way. During this time, they may find that they believe that they are not enough for the opposite sex.

So regardless of whether they are a man or woman, they are still going to have the same outlook. Men/women are going to be seen as being superior, and it won’t matter what they do.

The Truth

Even so, this doesn’t mean that one hasn’t tried to change what they believe. There is the chance that they have put a lot of effort into their appearance over the years; with this being seen as a way for them to increase their value.

Along with this, they may have put a lot effort into achieving things, and this could mean that they are doing well in their career. Nevertheless, what they have done won’t have allowed them to change what they believe.

Feedback

If one was to open up to the people they spend time with, they might find it hard to understand why they believe this. This is because one could be seen as someone who has everything going for them.

One could be told that there is nothing wrong with them, and that they need to let go of what they believe, for instance. But if one is not in a good position in life, these people could tell them that they need to work on their self-esteem.

One Approach

If hasn’t done anything to change what is taking place within them, they could end up trying to develop their self-esteem. Through doing this, they may find that they no longer feel less-than the opposite sex.

But there is also the chance that this won’t work, and one might have tried this approach in the past. It is then not going to be enough for them to simply focus on their mind; they will need to get in touch with what is taking place in their body.

Going Deeper

If they were to get in touch with their body, they may find that they are carrying toxic shame. This is then going to cause them to feel as though they are completely worthless, and this will be something that has permeated their whole being.

In order for one embrace their inherent value, they will need to let go of how they feel. And the reason they feel this way is likely to be due to what took place when they were younger.

Awareness

This may have been a time where they were abused and/or neglected, and this would have stopped them from being able to develop in the right way. Ultimately, there is nothing inherently wrong with who they are.

If one can relate to this and they want to change their life, they may need to work with a therapist or a healer.

Prolific writer, author, and coach, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over one thousand three hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. His current projects include ‘A Dialogue With The Heart’ and ‘Communication Made Easy’.

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